Question
Assalamu Alaikum, I have a question and I need a fatwa. My mother has 2 sisters and one of them stole the inheritance of my grandfather and didn’t want to show us any papers and documents of my grandfather of how much money he had. But still we had contact with her because of the importance of silat arrahim (kinship) This sister and my grandmother and my mother had problems with the other sister of my mother so they didn’t speak to each other. My mother spoke again with this sister that had a fight with everyone and wanted to make it right between her mother and other sister. My grandmother was so mad that she didn’t open the door anymore for us and didn’t want to speak to my mother nor to my aunt and she also didn’t want to pick up the phone anymore. Until she died we didn’t speak to her because she didn’t allow us. At the same time my other aunt that stole our inheritance also cut off the ties with us also because we also got a fight about the inheritance of my grandmother. Also the other aunt that caused this whole issue why mother didn’t speak anymore to her mother or sister also cut off ties with my mother while nothing happened between them. But my aunt didn’t want to pick up the phone anymore and also didn’t want to reply via whatsapp messages anymore. My question: we have a lot of peace right now because we don’t have contact with my 2 aunts. My question is, are we going to be punished for not having silat arrahim? Even when my aunt is the one who cut off the contact and didn’t want to reply anymore on calls and messages. And my other aunt is the one who stole our inheritance and the contact was also cut off because of the inheritance of my grandmother as she also didn’t want to show us any documents and papers so we could also check. So is it okay to stay like this? Assalamu Alaikum, Adil
Wa Alaikum Assalam wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh, Adil,
May Allah grant you clarity and ease in this matter. Below is the response to your question based on general Islamic principles:
- The Importance of Silat ar-Rahim (Maintaining Ties of Kinship)
Maintaining ties of kinship (silat ar-rahim) is an emphasized obligation in Islam. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:
– وعن أَبي محمد جُبَيْرِ بنِ مُطْعِمٍ: أَنَّ رسولَ اللَّه ﷺ قَالَ: لا يَدْخُلُ الجَنَّةَ قَاطِعٌ، قَالَ سفيان في روايته: يَعْني: قاطِع رحِم. متفقٌ عَلَيهِ.
“The one who severs ties of kinship will not enter Paradise.” (Sahih al-Bukhari, Sahih Muslim)) 4/339 Riyad us Saliheen)
Even when family members behave unjustly, Islam encourages maintaining some level of contact to fulfill this obligation.
- When the Other Party Severs Ties
If your aunts are the ones who have cut ties and refuse to respond to calls or messages, you are not considered sinful as long as you have made reasonable efforts to reconcile. The Prophet ﷺ said:
عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ: لَيْسَ الْوَاصِلُ بِالْمُكَافِئِ، وَلَكِنَّ الْوَاصِلَ الَّذِي إِذَا قُطِعَتْ رَحِمُهُ وَصَلَهَا
(Al Adab ul Mufrad: 2/21)
“The one who maintains the ties of kinship is not the one who merely reciprocates, but the one who maintains ties even when his relatives sever them.” (Sahih al-Bukhari)
Thus, your obligation is to:
- Continue making efforts to reach out, such as sending occasional messages, gifts, or making dua for them.
- Avoid harboring hatred or seeking revenge.
If they persist in ignoring your efforts, the sin of cutting ties lies upon them, not you.
- Handling Injustice (Inheritance Issue)
The issue of your aunt withholding inheritance is a grave matter. Islam strictly prohibits unjustly taking the rights of others, especially inheritance. Allah says:
إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ يَأْكُلُونَ أَمْوَٰلَ ٱلْيَتَـٰمَىٰ ظُلْمًا إِنَّمَا يَأْكُلُونَ فِى بُطُونِهِمْ نَارًۭا ۖ وَسَيَصْلَوْنَ سَعِيرًۭا
“Indeed, those who consume the property of orphans unjustly are only consuming fire into their bellies. And they will be burned in a Blaze.” (Qur’an 4:10)
In this case:
- You are permitted to pursue your rightful share of the inheritance through Islamic legal means, such as involving a trustworthy scholar, mediator, or even legal authorities if needed.
- However, this pursuit should not involve severing ties or retaliating with similar wrongs. Even while addressing the injustice, maintain good character and uphold Islamic ethics.
- Maintaining Peace While Keeping Obligations
It is understandable that keeping distance has brought peace. However, complete severance of ties is not ideal. Here are some practical steps to balance peace and your Islamic duty:
- Minimal Contact: You can fulfill silat ar-rahim with minimal gestures, such as sending salaam through messages, occasional calls, or forwarding a neutral gift during Ramadan or Eid.
- Avoid Further Conflict: Limit discussions about sensitive issues like inheritance if they lead to arguments.
- Make Dua: Continuously make dua for reconciliation and guidance for all parties. The Prophet ﷺ said:
عنه أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم كان يقول: دعوة المرء المسلم لأخيه بظهر الغيب مستجابة، عند رأسه ملك موكل كلما دعا لأخيه بخير قال الملك الموكل به: آمين، ولك بمثل ((رواه مسلم))
“The supplication of a Muslim for his brother in his absence will certainly be answered.” (Sahih Muslim)(Riyad as Saliheen 1495)
- Conclusion and Final Fatwa
In summary:
- You are not sinful for the current state of relations if your efforts to reconcile have been rejected.
- Continue making minimal efforts to maintain ties, such as sending occasional messages or greetings, even if they do not respond.
- Avoid cutting ties completely, as maintaining even small gestures fulfills the obligation of silat ar-rahim.
- Pursue your inheritance rights in a just and Islamic manner without allowing this issue to sever ties permanently.
May Allah guide you, grant you peace, and mend the hearts of your family.
واللہ تعالیٰ ورسولہ الکریم ﷺ اعلم بالصواب
Written by: Mufti Syed Siraj Ul Arifeen Shah
St. Ives (Cambridgeshire, UK)
10/01/2025 20:41 PM, 9 Rajab, 1446 Hijri
